stamp 202512161310
Siobhan Brier Aguilar. “I read Elizabeth Gilbert’s new book about her plot to k.ll her gf so you don’t have to.” Dec 10, 2025. Video, 2:04:00. https://youtu.be/fsP41-iIysQ?si=Wm5Hsx1vcn8PGMYR
Notes
1:26:20
Caregiver burnout is a thing, intrusive thoughts are a typical symptom
- Liz Gilbert experienced: thoughts about killing Rayya
- Siobhan’s own experience: hurting herself
She says there might be something in seeing someone so genetically similar to you going through stuff
- See my intrusive thoughts and eventual post-traumatic growth after my mom died
1:26:59
Thought policing and thought punishing are counterproductive, it will stick more than if you think “well, random neurons firing randomly, it happens”
- see also: playing Tetris after trauma helps prevent PTSD (Source? Jane McGonigal’s TED Talk I believe - https://youtu.be/lfBpsV1Hwqs?si=gycyqUh5CpwegYxh)
1:28:38
Did you like it and was it good is two different things about a book. S quotes her college prof. She adds: maybe add if you like the author (to inspect you biases)
1:42:00
Quoting her dad: I have no problem with people who speak to God. Hell I don’t even have a problem with people who say God speaks back. I start having a problem when people try to speak FOR God.
- See: 4a1-harari-calls-it-a-magic-trick-how-believers-swap-versions-of-god-so-god-can-serve-their-agenda
1:48:48
Reading recommendations
Conclusion
She concludes:
- Liz Gilbert deserves credit for writing the book that covers two difficult and rarely discussed things: end-of-life caregiving and love and sex addiction. She says, even tho she didn’t like the book, it could help people to feel seen and not to feel alone.
- Liz Gilbert speaks too much for Rayya and for God.
- The marketing of the book was shady. It focused too much on “the author of Eat Pray Love tried to kill her girlfriend”, while in the book, it was only intrusive thoughts, not an actual attempt.
- Substance use (and abuse) impacted the quality of the book.
- There was a lot of focus on Liz Gilbert’s bad decisions and too little on the people who actually went “all the way to the river” with Rayya. S missed the representation of good caregiver practice in contrast to the bad one.
Related
- The book is All the Way to the River by Elizabeth Gilbert